` My Pink Lil World(:

The Dancer

`03 April

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The Dancer's Past

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Credits

SHYAN the bestie

Friday, August 29, 2008

FOOLS OF FRIENDSHIP

everything is so upsetting right nw.
im not sure if it's i/we got kicked out of TechniQues.
why?
cos we refused to participate in Dhool wif 4 Dee Krew.
i know we're wrong in giving up,
but wad he just did, is hurting.
and depressing.
wad he jus sms-ed me,
depicts the end of a friendship.
and it's that of a much treasured one.
initially we were sick of it already,
and we got the wilcards bullshit.

why did we ever join in the 1st place?
it was because of him.
why did we willingly go thru so much suffering,
travel so far for prac,
pay for the costumes,
spray our shoes,
sleepless nights to fix the costumes,
it was,
all for him.
because we were friends.
because we wanted to help him.
wad did we get?
my friends al came down to see us lose,
everyone voted and bombed their hp bills for us.
and we din get in.
nvm, it's al good.
we dun mind.

then came the wilcards.
we did not want to dance anymore already.
we wun get in anyway,
the indians wun appreciate our dance anyway,
nobody will be coming anyway.
he said that THEY reali want it.
he says that he dun wanna dance too,
but THEY want it.
we said okay,
unwillingly.

we were so unhappy then,
THEY said,
"if u guys don't want, we wun force u guys."
we say dun want then.

then he msg us,
saying that we shouldn't be so selfish.
because THEY want it.
and he discussed it wif big guy already and big guy wants to help us.
so we gave up being selfish and suffered ourselves.
he said that he worked everything out already.
i was sick on wed.
feel terrible on thurs.
felt like vommiting when dancing.
hung in thr.
but little progress was made,
we din even learn half of the song.
and he din even choreo half of the song.

and what was it u said previously?
that he worked everything out already?
liar.
we gave in,
gave in and gave in.
initially u guys said we have a choice,
but did we reali ?
no we din.
we were forced to join.
we were forced to participate because of u.
maybe i shouldn't blame u bcos we chose to help u.

this morning we cldn't take it anymore.
and totally not possible to learn everything by today and produce great stuff on sunday.
CONFIRM cannot.
that time we put in so much effort to practise alr,
but what happened in the end?
i gave my full out i gave my best.
but they cocked up.
screwed everything up.
wad makes u think that 2 days of 3-hr practises can surpass this?
no way.
we jus gonna look like fools on stage.
we wun be able to catch it and we wun be able to deliver.
and we're not happy dancing.
so we decided nt to participate.

i can say i feel reali guilty and sorry.
im an A HOLE for disappointing u guys.
u know why i refuse to reply sms-es and pick up phone calls?
bcos u guys will make sure that we join.
despite whether we're happy/nt,
in total disregard of our feelings.
im sure that'll happen.
thats why i dun wanna listen to it no more,im sorry.

but ur last sms,
hurt,
sting,
stabbed like hell.

u said that i/we're not in TechniQues anymore.
we're not BLOODY EFFIN FIT TO CALL OURSELVES MEMBERS OF TECH.
YEAH DAMN RIGHT MAN.
maybe u're effin right.
even so if we backed out,
did u have to be so hurtful?
so we got kicked out of tech bcos we dun wanna dance for the EFFIN 4 DEE KREW.

then FCUK 4 DEE KREW.
FCUk the previous practises.
FCUK the money we spent.
FCUK the sleepless nights we had.
FCUK this FCUKING friendship.
it was all for nothing.
it was al for FCUK.

im not saying we're not in the wrong
but
u've jus torn up my heart into pieces.
u've jus let our friendship go.
u'd jus FCUKED me up.